REALIZE YOURSELF AS YOUR OWN BUDDIES

Everyone has their own world of thinking, feeling and acting. Most of the time those thoughts are coming from our past or related to our future events. Yes sometimes we have thoughts related to our present. Though we are tend to understand other's act or behavior, we tend to assess their movement, correct others as well as criticize them as like we have no fault. It seems that we are someone who got the job of a good critic in the world.

So, give yourself a pause and let's try to understand thyself first. Specifically to understand our own psychology we have to focus on -

Our own Behavior: Which is our actions.

Our own Emotion: To know how to feel in different context or in different situations.

Our own Thoughts: How and what we think in different situations and changes of thoughts with different people.

This three things are the keys of a person's mind. As we know this three aspects of our mind influences each other.

Thoughts always influence our emotions and vice versa emotions are tend to influence our thoughts, for an example if I think that I am done with the work I was trying for long, then my emotion will be something empty or undone. As same if my emotion is like feeling frustration then my thought will come up like 'well I have to give up'.

Similarly our Behavior influence our thoughts and our thoughts has strong influence to our behavior. For an example, If my behavior is arguing with some one I like, then my thoughts will be 'ok this is high time to fight, let's fight.' If my thought is 'my friend is not trustworthy ' then my behavior might be suspicious to my friend & I will tend to keep eye on her every movement.

As same Emotions are controlling our behavior alike behavior has tremendous effect to our emotions. Such as my sad feeling can give a bad reaction with someone when I will talk, and if I have fight with someone it will give me an angry or disappointment feeling again.

In a nutshell we will have to know this Three things , easy to remember BET. I need to identify and realize what are the things turn my behavior rough or good when communicating with others, what are the things turn my feelings up and down and what are the things make my thoughts hard or soft. If I am able to recognize it then and only then I can help me to manage those things in a proper way. We are not perfect being. Only almighty is perfect. We are not trying to be perfect. We are just trying to help us to live a healthy life ahead. Sometimes we say that 'even I do not know myself well', this is the way we create confusion in our life. Let's start to know myself from today. Be your own buddies to understand yourself precisely. I swear that one day you will become a very good friend of yourself, who will guide you when needed as well as entertain you when you will seek for it. Best wishes.

Written by

Shammi Akhter

Assistant Counseling psychologist

& Former Behavior Therapist

Ref. STRESS ANXIETY DEPRESSION by Martin Simmons & Peter Daw, Basic Psychology.